Anger Issues and Management

Hi


Anger... Hhmmm....

Something not everyone experiences it. Also something people don't accept that they deal with it. That is me. I admit I have a bit of anger issues but I have been denying it for a long time. From the moment I realised, I had to take action and make changes to get rid of my anger or at least reduce it.


These are some of the things I do to improve my anger issues and you can try too.




Talk less

Often times, an argument or the feeling of anger starts from a conversation i.e. talking. If you feel the conversation is not heading well, stay quiet. "A meaningful silence is better than meaningless words". If you know me as an individual, you will notice I don't always talk a lot. This is because I like to maintain peace with people just in case.


Step away

If it did not work out and you are angry, step away from the situation. As a Muslim I can advice to perform ablution (wudu) and pray; turn to Allah swt. Another thing that helps with the situation is reading the Qur'an.

Talk to yourself

Yes, talk to yourself. Evaluate the situation or self-reflection. Whose fault was it? Yours? Hers/his? Was it serious or childish? Should you have got angry? Was it reasonable for you or the other person to react like that? What exactly made you angry and why? Things like this. It is also very important to think from the other person's shoes. Sometimes you won't get the answer by yourself. If so, speak to someone close, friend, family, etc. Second opinions help a lot in these situations. Beware from the ones who might lead you to the wrong decision/path. This is up to you to decide from their words or actions.

Let it out

As stupid it may sound, trust me in this one. Let it out. Cry it out or if you have a pillow or a doll (strange but still) at home, let the anger out in the object by doing whatever you want rather than letting it out on someone who probably cares for you. You will hurt their feelings when they are innocent and just care for you. If you are like me (a loner), write it out in a journal or diary.

Communication

Sometimes their actions did not intent to hurt you or make you angry. Lack of communication or misunderstanding makes it worse. Let the person know you are angry at them and explain why. How did they hurt you? Explain it. As far as I believe in humanity, the person won't hurt you and would apologise. If you are quiet, the person will not realise you are angry at them. However, stay in limit. Just because they hurt you it doesn't mean you can hurt them back. That improves nothing, it just makes everything worse. Again they may have not intended to hurt you.

Apologise, forgive and forget

After all the evaluations, if it is your fault, apologise and move on. If it is the other person's fault, forgive them and forget about it. Mistakes happen to the best of us and it is stupid to holding a grudge of it. Think that it never happen. Who likes haters or enemies c'mon!

Relax and meditate

Get rid of all the bad thoughts and just chill! Do things you find relaxing or enjoy alone or with good company.

Avoid people

No! Don't avoid everyone. Avoid people or conversations that make you angry. Change the topic. Do it nicely, don't be rude. Try to act maturely in the future and see if previous experiences have helped you cope with such situations in a better way.

Learn from the experiences

You are never too old to learn new things. Learn from the experiences of you being angry and use them in the future or now to make be a better you. You are awesome (I know you are) but there is always room for improvement. Who said people are perfect? Your imperfections make you perfect.


Start to take things lightheartedly


I hope this helps you if you are encountering such issues currently or in the future. If you would like to  speak to me further about this you can drop me an email: nafizasami@gmail.com . I will try to contact you with help as soon as possible.
Remember to check back every Wednesday and Saturday!

How do you deal with anger? Let me know in the comments!

Take care

Yours, Nafiza

7 Ingredient Quiche

Hey!!!


I was about to post something about anger issues. Then yesterday I made something and I could not resist from sharing it with my fellow friends. From the title you can guess it's a really quick and easy quiche, all from scratch and handmade. So, here we go!


Ingredients:



For Shortcrust pastry:

250g Flour

125g Butter (chilled and in small cubes)

Salt to taste

4 Tbsp Milk



For Filling:

5 Eggs

500ml Milk

Salt to taste

Any topping you fancy (optional)

Cheese of choice

Method:


1. In a big bowl, pour in the flour and add salt. Then add the butter cubes and rub the butter and flour together till you have crumbles.

2. Pour in the milk gradually and form a ball of dough without further kneading it.

3. Cover the dough in cling film (Saran Wrap for you Americans) and let it chill in the fridge for 30 minutes.

4. Prepare the toppings. If they are vegetables, it is best to stir fry them lightly and let them cool.

5. In another bowl, pour the milk and crack the eggs in it and beat them together until well mixed.

6. Take the dough out and roll it in a thin sheet. Line your baking pan with the dough and let that chill in the fridge for another 20-30 minutes.

7. Take out the baking pan with the dough and bake it at 180 °C for 10 minutes.

8. Take the pan out of the oven and add the chosen toppings, followed by adding the egg-milk mixture. Finish the top by adding cheese.

9. Return that in the oven at the same temperature for 45-50 minutes or until it is solid when checked.

Ways to check: Shake the pan slightly and see if the centre is wobbling or is firm. If it wobbles, give it some more time and if it is firm it's done. Another way is to take a long wooden spoon and press it against the mixture. If it feels like liquid it's not done yet. If it's firm then it'd done.

10. Take it out and serve


It is really easy and quick to make. The most important thing, these ingredients are always available at home so it shows you can make amazing things from simple ingredients and impress your friends and family.

Here is how mine looked:

I added frozen mixed veg, peppers, onion, potatoes and a cheeky bit of grilled chicken and tuna. Yes chicken and tuna together does taste nice and no one notices it.

Hope you enjoyed it and make sure to share with me if you try this. Remember to come back every Wednesdays and Saturdays. You can guess what the post is about from my into this Saturday.

Take Care

Yours, Nafiza

Learning Bengali

Hello!


Hope you are well. This is a bit of a different post from my usual and I thought it would be quite fun for me to do. From my first ever post, I mentioned that I am Bengali by ethnicity. What people may not know is that not all Bengalis are Sylhetis and that includes me. What they may not know that a non-Sylheti is not always from Dhaka which is also me. I am from a region called Khulna. The following map will explain it all:

As you can see, the top right is Sylhet, the centre is Dhaka and the bottom left is my region called Khulna.

Anyway, I speak shuddho Bengali and I will teach you some basic Bengali stuff for fun or if you encounter someone Bengali and want to try it with them.

Greeting/Introduction

- Hello = Salam or Hello (there is no particular way of saying hello)

- Welcome = Shagotom

- How are you? = Kemon acho? (achis is very informal and achen is very formal)

- Are you okay/well? = Tumi bhalo acho? ( "  ")

- How is everyone? = Shobay kemon ache?

- I am good/well = Ami bhalo achi

- I am not good = Ami bhalo nei

- I am healthy/ill = Ami shusto asi/Ami oshusto

- My name is x = Amar naam x

- What is your name? = Tomar naam ki?

Understanding/Courtesy

- I (don't) understand = Ami bujhi (na)

- Do you understand? = Bujhte paro?

- I understand English/Bengali = Ami English/Bangla bujhi

- I don't understand English/Bengali = Ami English/Bangla bujhina

- I can speak English/Bengali = Ami English/Bangla bolte pari

- I can't speak English/Bengali = Ami English/Bangla bolte pari na

- Sorry = Maf kore dao

- Please = Doea kore

- Thank you = Dhonnobad

- Help me! = Amake shahajjo koro!

Like/Love

- I like you = Ami tomake pochondo kori

- I don't like you = Ami tomake pochondo kori na

- I love you = Ami tomake bhalo bashi

- I hate you = Ami tomake ghinna kori

- I like x = Amar x pochondo (x is anything you want to mention)

- I don't like x = Amar x pochondo na

- I love x = Ami x bhalo bashi

- I hate x = Ami x ghinna kori

Numbers

1 = Ek

2= Dui

3 = Tin

4 = Char

5 = Pach

6 = Soe

7 = Shat

8 = Aat

9 = Noe

10 = Dosh

11 = Egaro

12 = Baro

13 = Tero

14 = Choddo

15 = Ponero

16 = Sholo

17 = Shataro

18 = Atharo

19 = Unish

20 = Bish

Insults (mild)

- Evil = Shoetan

- Son of x = x- er baccha

- Dog = Kutto (female = kutti)

- Shut up = Chup

- I will break your x = Tumar x bhange dibani

Asha kori tomader ei post ta bhalo lagse. Amar duite bandhobider dhonnobad janate chai: Marjan ke ei idea deoar jonno ar Maliha, Spain theke, amake shahajjo korar jonno. More rekho prottek Budbar ar Shonibar fire ashar jonno notun post er jonni.

Translation:

I hope you enjoyed this post. I would like to thank two of my friends; Marjan for giving me this idea and Maliha from Spain for helping me. What language do you speak? Let me know below in the comments. Remember to check back every Wednesdays and Saturdays for new posts.

Take care

Yours, Nafiza